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Thread: Sea of Tears


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    Red face Sea of Tears

    Ahoy there! If you know me from Wizard101Central, you'll know that I'm pretty slow when it comes to getting chapters out. I just want to let you know that I'll try my best to update often, so your patience is greatly appreciated. Constructive criticism is welcome; in fact, it is wanted. If you read even just a little, a small comment would make me a very happy pirate! Enjoy!


    Sea of Tears

    Table of Contents

    Prologue- pg. 1
    Chapter 1- COMING SOON!


    ---------- Post added at 04:42 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:33 PM ----------

    Prologue


    I was always told to never go down without a fight. To give it your all before that last breath. To not keep your head down but to stare your killer in the eyes. To, if death be imminent, die with honor. It was a romanticized thought, dying with honor. Although it was easy to say, I just never imagined how difficult it would be.

    For there I was, going against everything that had been told to me. There was no fighting back. There was no clinging on to every last bit of life within me. And despite the mirrored walls that surrounded me, I could hardly stare my killer in the eyes. I felt no honor in my close death. Just an emptiness in my heart.

    Something made me glance up to see my murderer in tears, gazing back at me with widened eyes through the mirror. I had broken yet again another rule. I could just hear Captain Wilde chastising me, "To cry is to show fear, and you must never let the enemy know you are afraid."

    Were these tears of fear? I wasn't sure, for I wasn't one to cry often. In fact, I hardly ever cried at all. I let the tears slide, not even bothering to wipe them away. The real enemy was approaching soon; I could hear the thundering footsteps nearby.

    A teardrop trickled against my lips, salty like the sea. I was suddenly reminded of a story told to me as a child. The thought was warming, and my hand immediately reached up to clasp onto the key that I wore as a necklace. Strange as it seems, that's when I knew that these weren't tears of fear. These were tears of courage. There was no doubt of it; my heart lost its emptiness, and I suddenly was filled with hope once again.

    I heard the doors burst open, accompanied by murderous yells. However, rather than look at them, I kept my eyes locked onto my own eyes in the mirror across the room. I was to stare my killer in the eyes, wasn't I?

    Let them see me cry, I thought to myself as more tears slid down my cheek. Let them see me die with honor.
    Last edited by Kairi; 05-13-2012 at 07:03 PM.





  2. #2
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    Re: Sea of Tears

    So far so good, cant wait to read the rest



  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Dreamer For This Useful Post:

    Kairi (05-13-2012)


  4. #3
    Lunus Lovegood's Avatar
       Lunus Lovegood is offline Deck Swabber
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    Re: Sea of Tears

    nice! very interesting!



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    Kairi (05-13-2012)


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    Re: Sea of Tears

    Awesome! Can't wait for the other parts!





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    Kairi (05-14-2012)


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    Re: Sea of Tears

    As usual a thrilling beginning, but you don't you feel you are using this style as a crutch? Every story on central(s) you write has a prologue pretty much exactly like this. A character is about to die, you leave right before the climax, and we revisit the actions that bring us to that point. A very successful and lovely template, but it loses its luster when used to much.

    I'll just shut up now and enjoy the story.



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    Kairi (05-14-2012)


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    Re: Sea of Tears

    Quote Originally Posted by Written_word View Post
    As usual a thrilling beginning, but you don't you feel you are using this style as a crutch? Every story on central(s) you write has a prologue pretty much exactly like this. A character is about to die, you leave right before the climax, and we revisit the actions that bring us to that point. A very successful and lovely template, but it loses its luster when used to much.

    I'll just shut up now and enjoy the story.
    No need to shut up! You're absolutely and completely right! I think what happened there is that I was trying to figure out how to reel in attention like I did for my other stories, but I didn't really realize that I was reusing intros until you pointed it out. I'll definitely work on it, and thanks for letting me know!



  11. #7
    Jack Frost's Avatar
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    Re: Sea of Tears

    Well I believed it a nice story, keep up the writing



  12. #8
    JosephFireCloud's Avatar
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    Re: Sea of Tears

    wow amazing keep up the great work!



  13. #9
    Bird Crazy's Avatar
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    Re: Sea of Tears

    Nice start, can't wait for the rest of it.



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    Re: Sea of Tears

    More... Must have... MORE!!!! Its SO good. XD Keep writing. Drop out of school and become an author. DO IT NOW. O_O



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