BLOGS

The Hoodoo Master

Q&A with Hastur

Rate this Entry
Hey there boys and girls,ladies and gentlemen!

HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING TODAY?NAME'S Hastur!

I'VE BEEN AROUND FOR A LONG TIME.I'VE SEEN THINGS YOU CAN HARDLY GRASP WITH YOUR LITTLE FLESHLY MINDS,AND HEARD THINGS THAT YOU'D NEVER BE ABLE TO ERASE FROM YOUR BRAINS!

IN MY TIME,LIVING AND WORKING,I'VE GAINED AN IMMENSE AMOUNT OF KNOWLEDGE!SO ALLOW ME TO SHOW YOU BEHIND THE CURTAIN OF REALITY,BEHIND THE WORLD YOU KNOW,AND INTO THE WONDERFUL BRILLIANCE AND AGONY OF EXISTENCE!

HISTORY'S GREATEST AND WISEST SAGES,MYSTICS,PROPHETS AND PHILOSOPHERS WOULD TRADE LIFE AND LIMB FOR A SLIVER OF MY INCREDIBLE KNOWLEDGE...SO I'M GIVING IT AWAY TO ALL YOU LITTLE PEOPLE IN THE SPIRAL,WASTING IT ON ALL YOU READY TO ASK AND ANSWER QUESTIONS.

SO,ON THIS VERY THREAD I WILL ALLOW YOU TO ASK ME,HASTUR ANYTHING YOUR LITTLE MINDS CAN CONJURE!

WHY,YOU MAY ASK?FOR THE SAME REASON PROMETHEUS CHOSE TO GIVE FIRE TO MAN:TO WATCH HIM BURN THE VILLAGE DOWN AND HILARIOUSLY BE CHASED AWAY FROM IT!

I WILL ONLY ACCEPT CERTAIN OFFERINGS LIKE RECORDED SCREAMS,SQUEEZED LEMONS,DEAD LLAMAS,AND SUCH.NONE OF THAT CRUMMY INCENSE ALL THE OTHERS ARE GETTING.

__________________________________________________ ________________________________________________

OK,guys,so you may be curious about this one.Meet Hastur,a character I have yet to develop.He's,in it's simplest,a demon(albeit,he prefers the term aeonic god) and this is your chance to get to know him better.Ask away.He's bombastic as you can imagine.

Literally,ask any question on your mind.What is the meaning of life?Where do you come from?Are you real?Why do you type in All-Caps?Why is Blind Mew blind?Who would win in a fight,a pack of lions or a T-Rex?

Submit "Q&A with Hastur" to Digg Submit "Q&A with Hastur" to del.icio.us Submit "Q&A with Hastur" to StumbleUpon Submit "Q&A with Hastur" to Google

Categories
Uncategorized


Comments

  1. The Hoodoo Master's Avatar
    MY FAVORITE SONG,FOR FUTURE REFERENCE IS
  2. ShadowStrikeV2's Avatar
    What is your view of the Templar Order and their master? Any high ranking member has access to knowledge more ancient than the elemental Titans themselves, and a direct line to the power of the Lord of Light aka Bon Dye, aka the Nameless God.
    Updated 05-10-2015 at 12:48 PM by ShadowStrikeV2
  3. The Hoodoo Master's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by ShadowStrikeV2
    What is your view of the Templar Order and their master? Any high ranking member has access to knowledge more ancient than the elemental Titans themselves, and a direct line to the power of the Lord of Light aka Bon Dye, aka the Nameless God.
    YOUR QUESTION IS FLAWED.MY VIEW IS MY OBSERVATION,THAT WHICH TAINTS MY OBSERVATION.THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS OBJECTIVE OBSERVATION,FOR EVERYTHING EXISTS IN ALIGNMENT WITH YOUR PERCEPTION OF IT,AS DO YOU EXIST IN SUCH A MANNER.

    ERGO MY PERCEPTION IS ONE THAT'S FLEXIBLE BASED ON HOW YOU INTERPRET IT.I HAVE APPEARED TO MEN AS THEY HAVE PERCEIVED ME,AND HAVE THOUGHT THEM THAT WHICH THEY WERE ON THE VERGE OF KNOWING.YOU COULD SAY I'VE ALWAYS EXISTED AS THIS FIGURE,BUT I'VE NEVER EXISTED BEFORE YOU'VE ENGAGED ME.

    THEN AGAIN,YOU HAVEN'T EITHER.

    MY VIEW IS AS A FORCE BEST NOT TO MEDDLE WITH.BEST NOT OPPOSE THEM,NOR ALLY ONESELF WITH THEM.WHICH IS TO SAY,YOUR OBSERVATION OF MY VIEWS.
  4. ShadowStrikeV2's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by The Hoodoo Master
    YOUR QUESTION IS FLAWED.MY VIEW IS MY OBSERVATION,THAT WHICH TAINTS MY OBSERVATION.THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS OBJECTIVE OBSERVATION,FOR EVERYTHING EXISTS IN ALIGNMENT WITH YOUR PERCEPTION OF IT,AS DO YOU EXIST IN SUCH A MANNER.

    ERGO MY PERCEPTION IS ONE THAT'S FLEXIBLE BASED ON HOW YOU INTERPRET IT.I HAVE APPEARED TO MEN AS THEY HAVE PERCEIVED ME,AND HAVE THOUGHT THEM THAT WHICH THEY WERE ON THE VERGE OF KNOWING.YOU COULD SAY I'VE ALWAYS EXISTED AS THIS FIGURE,BUT I'VE NEVER EXISTED BEFORE YOU'VE ENGAGED ME.

    THEN AGAIN,YOU HAVEN'T EITHER.

    MY VIEW IS AS A FORCE BEST NOT TO MEDDLE WITH.BEST NOT OPPOSE THEM,NOR ALLY ONESELF WITH THEM.WHICH IS TO SAY,YOUR OBSERVATION OF MY VIEWS.
    Ok then, allow me to rephrase that. What are your feelings towards them? What do you see them as to yourself personally. Do you see them as enemies or hindrances? Or are they beneath your worry?

    And why do you speak in all caps? Are you just that excited? And if so, about what?

    Also, what are your thoughts about Vengeance, the spirit. Would you consider him an ally worth having on your side? Or are you uninterested in it? Do you find it childish in comparison to yourself?
  5. The Hoodoo Master's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by ShadowStrikeV2
    Ok then, allow me to rephrase that. What are your feelings towards them? What do you see them as to yourself personally. Do you see them as enemies or hindrances? Or are they beneath your worry?

    And why do you speak in all caps? Are you just that excited? And if so, about what?

    Also, what are your thoughts about Vengeance, the spirit. Would you consider him an ally worth having on your side? Or are you uninterested in it? Do you find it childish in comparison to yourself?
    I THINK IN ALL CAPS.THAT'S WHY I TALK IN THEM.

    FAR FROM A HINDRANCE,AND FAR FROM AN ENEMY!FAR FROM AN ALLY AS WELL.THINK OF IT AS THAT ONE INFERNO THAT'LL BURN YOU IF YOU GET TOO CLOSE,BUT WILL DESTROY YOUR ENEMIES IF YOU STAY AWAY.

    HAHA,VENGEANCE?HE'S LUCKY HE'S ON GOOD TERMS WITH ME.HE'S A HYPOCRIT WHO MOCKS THOSE WHO DO NOT GIVE INTO THEIR OWN EVIL,YET STAYS OUT OF SIGHT,NOT GRASPING HIS OWN DESTINY.THAT IS,BEFORE THAT SHADOW GUY THREW HIM INTO THE LAKE OF FIRE.THAT WAS HILARIOUS!

    HEY,WANNA HEAR A JOKE?FREE WILL IS REAL!PSYCHE!
  6. The Hoodoo Master's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Drakon
    My only question is how do you know that you speak in all caps? I feel like that's kind of breaking the fourth wall, even in a Q/A...
    LOOK,KID,THE FOURTH WALL IS SIMPLY A CONSTRUCT OF YOUR IMAGINATIONS,AND HAS LITTLE BASIS IN MY WORLDVIEW.

    LITERALLY,I'M IN THE FOURTH WALL,OUTSIDE OF IT,AND I AM IT!I HAVE NO QUALMS WITH SHUTTING MY MOUTH ABOUT IT,YOU AND ALL THESE RANDOM SCRIBES WRITING DOWN EVERYTHING I SAY IN THE SAME MANNER THAT I HAVE NO QUALMS WITH JUMPING IN AND OUT.

    AND IF YOU THINK ME FOURTH-WALL-BREAKING YOU SHOULD MEET MY FRIEND BOB.THE FOURTH WALL REALLY IS OLD,AND IT HAS THAT YUCKY PALE YELLOW COLOR TO IT...NO WONDER MICE LIVE IN IT.BOB IS ONE OF THESE FIFTH DIMENSIONAL RATS.THEY'RE KINDA FUN GUYS...
  7. The Hoodoo Master's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by 2943
    Hey whos your mom?
    THE DESTRUCTION OF ALL OXYGEN LEADING TO MASS ASPHYXIATION!

    SORRY,WRONG QUESTION.ANYWAYS,THE CLOSEST THING TO A MOTHER I HAVE IS THE PRIMEVAL CHAOS THAT EXISTED AT THE BEGINNING OF EVERYTHING.DO YOU KNOW HOW CONTROLLING SHE IS?